Everyone is busy and pressed for time, but we all want to make an impact—so here is the shortest course in communication I can give you.
The seven most important words:
I am sorry I made a mistake.
The six most important words:
I will learn to listen better.
The five most important words:
I truly believe in you.
The four most important words:
What do you think?
The three most important words:
I appreciate you!
The two most important words:
Thank you.
The one most important word:
We
And the last, least important, word:
If you want to have impact—if you truly want to make a difference—don’t let the world just hear you speak, but communicate through everything you do.
Be the kind of leader who holds it together. When times are tough (and they will be), be the kind of leader who does their best. But when you make mistakes (and you will make many), be the first to admit your mistake and say you are sorry.
Be the kind of leader who understands that listening is better than speaking. Too often we underestimate the power of the listening ear. Just to listen can be the greatest act of caring, with the biggest impact on connection.
Be the kind of leader who shows caring. The closest thing to being cared for is to care for someone else. Show appreciation and gratitude to others, speak up when you see hard work, and recognize effort.
Be the kind of leader who takes time on the busiest day. Never be too busy to appreciate others, to say, “Good job—I’m proud of you.” Gratitude inspires people to do great things.
Be the kind of leadership who celebrates in teamwork and collaboration. The strength of the team is each individual member. The strength of each member is the team. Be the kind of leader who engages with and is curious about each member, and set an example of open collaboration.
Be the kind of leader who puts we ahead of me. Don’t be the kind of leader who speaks in the terms of I and me. It is a simple but fundamental truth that by binding together as a single force each of us will remain strong and unconquerable.
Lead From Within: Leadership is far from simple. Sometimes we need quick reminders that communication is essential if we want to make a difference. What you say matters, and everything you do says something.
N A T I O N A L B E S T S E L L E R
The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness
After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.
Additional Reading you might enjoy:
- 12 Successful Leadership Principles That Never Grow Old
- A Leadership Manifesto: A Guide To Greatness
- How to Succeed as A New Leader
- 12 of The Most Common Lies Leaders Tell Themselves
- 4 Proven Reasons Why Intuitive Leaders Make Great Leaders
- The One Quality Every Leader Needs To Succeed
- The Deception Trap of Leadership
Photo Credit: Getty Images
Of Lolly’s many awards and accolades, Lolly was designated a Top-50 Leadership and Management Expert by Inc. magazine. Huffington Post honored Lolly with the title of The Most Inspiring Woman in the World. Her writing has appeared in HBR, Inc.com, Fast Company (Ask The Expert), Huffington Post, and Psychology Today, and others. Her newest book, The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness has become a national bestseller.
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32 Responses
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computer repair in schaumburg
08. Jul, 2014
Hi there, I log on to your new stuff like every week.
Your story-telling style is witty, keep doing what you’re
doing!
lollydaskal
09. Jul, 2014
Thank you very much for your kind words.
Nilay kumar
04. Jul, 2016
every post are awesome nd inseparable . wish to learn from you to be a blog writing.
Terri Klass
08. Jul, 2014
Great post, Lolly! I love how you creatively portrayed important leadership messages of love.
I would just add: How can I help?
Terri
lollydaskal
09. Jul, 2014
Love that Terri. Messages of Love.
Truth!
Thank you.
LaRae Quy
08. Jul, 2014
Wow…a very impactful post, Lolly!
Every phrase is so important if we want to be the sort of leader that truly accomplishes things with other people.
It takes a strong mind to focus on someone besides ourselves….
lollydaskal
09. Jul, 2014
Thanks LaRae
Everything we say matters, everything we do matters, our words connect us to others. Our words having meaning.
Bill Benoist
08. Jul, 2014
So easy to do – to engage others with kind words. It’s just a shame it is not practiced more often.
Great post, Lolly!
“Thank you”
lollydaskal
09. Jul, 2014
I don’t know what is not practiced by others. But if we can start with ourselves we can lead by example.
Panteli Tritchew
09. Jul, 2014
We need not be shamans to work magic. Hearts, like doors, can be opened with the right keys. The right words and gestures can open our own and others’ hearts. This is a lovely list of magic words, Lolly. Thank you.
lollydaskal
09. Jul, 2014
The right words are doorways into our hearts. Thanks for sharing Panteli
Muz
10. Jul, 2014
Currently, I’m at the crossroads on so many levels in my life and your list is thought provoking. I believe I can take some right decisions if I ponder on these words.
Thank you, Lolly.
Diane Dutchin
11. Jul, 2014
Lolly,
Deeply passionate, speaking from the heart, rich, and spot on.
This skill set is too often overlooked, which can result in unhealthy behavioral impact .
Thanks for sharing. This should be printed, and taped to every wall…especially…everyone!
Taping to my wall.
D
ada njom
18. Jul, 2014
Hello Lolly, I wish to be with you in person.
You are reach enough. I am learning alot from you.
Thanks God for making me get in contact with you. I will never be the same.
David Brooks
19. Jul, 2014
I am a new participant in your blog and I am gathering inspiration and hope every time I read a new post. You and bloggers are truly inspirational people! Keep on Blogging!
Dr. Sapna
20. Jul, 2014
Thank you Lolly. The basics of communication are global and applicable to entire humanity irrespective of nationality, gender, caste and status. AS I see it as a Counselor, most interpersonal and intra-personal issues are based on improper communication. Thanks once again for making it simple for all.
Chantal Bechervaise
27. Jul, 2014
Love this post Lolly! So clear, succinct and to the point. I am taking a communications class right now but this sums up key points for great communication.
Guvenc Altas
01. Aug, 2014
I really benefit from your posts Lolly ! We’re Lucky having you
Lori Ann Reber
02. Aug, 2014
Beautiful! I recently read an article about communication levels – Superficial, Personal, Validating. Superficial is fine but can not sustain healthy realationships. Your simplicity here takes us to where meaningful relationships desire to be – Personal and Validating! Thank you!
Søren Schnedler
08. Aug, 2014
You are as always right Lolly 🙂 As Martin Luther said many years ago:
“You are not only responsible for what you say, but also what you do not say”
And you might add ” – and what you do, and do not do”
Montse Rull
17. Aug, 2014
Great post to practice everyday! Thank you so much, Lolly.
ballroom judge
06. Sep, 2014
I’m gone to inform my little brother, that he should also pay a visit this webpage
on regular basis to get updated from most up-to-date gossip.
Khalid
30. Oct, 2014
Hello there
Great and so precious words. Very well said.
Regards.
ROHAN
13. Nov, 2014
Great one Lolly,
I learnt a lot from this.
Somewhere/ Some how, I feel that, Leader is more about I and Leadership is more about We. Both go hand in hand.
So I and We both are Important.
When Me Overpowers We – Leader shows his INFLUENCING Skills
When We Overpowers Me- Leader shows his RELATIONSHIP Skills
At Last :-
Leaders are Masters of Extremes- They Reflect Balance to People and Situations
Followers are Seekers of Balance 🙂
Leaders usually have a High Level of Individuality ( I and Me) and more so able to represent it with Highest Level of Diversity ( We)
Warm Regards,
Rohan
Ajit Kumar
13. Mar, 2017
‘Few words’ which could help in gaining becoming a LEADER. I would wish that every leader reads your Blog.
Goodluck
Tarak Banerjee
23. Mar, 2017
“I” is the word through which all the work is done. Any exceptional work is also through “I”. Team always achieves average. So why demeaning :”I”. Please explain.
Gbenga Oyewole
17. Apr, 2018
Sincerely speaking, your articles has contributed and will still continue to impact my life positively.
Get ready for the day I am going to teleport you blood and flesh to Nigeria to train emerging leaders.
I am greatful for your positive impact.