It can be hard to be a leader in today’s hurried business climate. People seem to expect a leader to know everything, be everything and do everything, all at the same time.
But even if you can, that doesn’t mean you should.
Great leaders know that deciding what not to do is as important as deciding what to do.
Most leaders executives, bosses, managers run into trouble when they think they need fix it all, but frankly that’s impossible.
In my new national bestselling book, The Leadership Gap, I highlight a big problem in leadership, the archetype, the leader I call the fixer, the fixer, is someone who needs to step in all the time and show they can do it all. they are constantly telling people what to do and how to do it without even waiting to see if people understand what they are saying or asking of
So how do we leverage the fixer within ourselves:
We need to fix the fixer: Before we can fix anyone, or anything we need to fix ourselves. Hire a coach or get a mentor, to help you get over the fact that you have to be the martyr, savor, of everyone and everything. deal with your inner demons. whatever they maybe, this may be the hardest part of healing yourself, its much easier said than done, because as human beings we are complicated and as a fixer we want to simplify everything.
Trust people to fend for themselves: As a leader helping other, you don’t allow them to fend for themselves, instead of always offering to rescue, solve, comfort, or defend. Learn to become a better listener than a leader who does a lot of talking. Become the kind of leader that’s compassionate and considerate, but don’t offer to take over someone else’s problems in order to make those problems go away. The best leaders empower others by just being there for them and listen with understanding.
Don’t cross boundaries: How many times have you found yourself in situations and you ask yourself how did I get in so deep, I don’t even belong here. don’t allow yourself as a leader to get swallowed up in other people challenges or complications,
Shield yourself from emotional hostage syndrome. Many years ago, I coined the phrase emotional hostage syndrome, when I started to notice some of my clients that I was coaching were feeling the things for another so strongly that they become hostage of their emotions. When you cannot separate yourself from another you lose perspective. In order to make sure you don’t lose perspective or a point of reference make sure you come from the right amount of apathy with a dash of empathy. Resist the urge to take on responsibility, where the responsibility belongs in the first place.
If you have a tendency to be a fixer, a problem solver, resolver, decipher or decoder. I am saying you think about taking one little step back – will you still be the leader?
The answer unequivocally is YES.
People will still view you as leader. Maybe even with more respect than if you always were fixing their problems, solving their challenges.
The best leader give the gift in others in trusting them and empowering them to solve their own problems, but letting them know that as leader you are standing right beside them and supporting them if they need you.
John Quincy Adams said, if your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more you are a leader.
Lead from within: At the end the best leaders don’t tell people how to do things, they support them and let them surprise you with their results. Because as a leader its not necessarily the one who does the greatest things but it’s the one who gets the people to do the greatest things that is a great leader.
N A T I O N A L B E S T S E L L E R
The Leadership Gap
What Gets Between You and Your Greatness
After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.
Additional Reading you might enjoy:
- 12 Successful Leadership Principles That Never Grow Old
- A Leadership Manifesto: A Guide To Greatness
- How to Succeed as A New Leader
- 12 of The Most Common Lies Leaders Tell Themselves
- 4 Proven Reasons Why Intuitive Leaders Make Great Leaders
- The One Quality Every Leader Needs To Succeed
- The Deception Trap of Leadership
Photo Credit: Getty Images
Of Lolly’s many awards and accolades, Lolly was designated a Top-50 Leadership and Management Expert by Inc. magazine. Huffington Post honored Lolly with the title of The Most Inspiring Woman in the World. Her writing has appeared in HBR, Inc.com, Fast Company (Ask The Expert), Huffington Post, and Psychology Today, and others. Her newest book, The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness has become a national bestseller.
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5 Responses
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Simon Zaku
02. Sep, 2017
Wow, awesome write up here.
True stuff.
Being a leader can be really difficult if you’ve not treated the demon in yourself. Thing is to become a leader, you need to know what it means to be led.
Like you said, leadership doesn’t mean you have to do everything always. I think that’s one of the “demons” leaders should treat.
“Learning to say no” OR “letting somethings go”.
It’s really difficult though. Lately, I’ve been tried to discipline myself to say no to somethings because I was always fund of saying yes to everything.
I’ve seen some improvements in my leadership traits and business.
Thanks for the post, Lolly.
Best,
Simon.
Michael LaRocca, Technical Editor
04. Dec, 2017
The best leaders also know how to delegate. Time spent doing ——– is time not spent doing ______, and sometimes ______ is much more important than ——–. Can I do my own payroll? Yes. Can I clean my own office? Absolutely. But given that the company is called Michael Edits and I am its only Michael, I should probably be editing. Delegating and outsourcing allow leaders to be the best leaders they’re capable of being. Why wouldn’t any leader want that?