It was Albert Einstein who said, “The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.”
Every thought we hold creates our future. And since every action we take depends on how we think, we cannot change anything if we cannot change our thinking.
The essence of the successful mind lies not in what it thinks, but in how it thinks. And so we need to minimize the what and concentrate on the how.
Here are 12 toxic thoughts that might be taking up too much real estate in your mind–if so, a quick eviction is in order.
1. Comparing yourself with others.
When your thinking revolves around comparing yourself with others, it’s a battle you will never win. Look in the mirror for your only competition.
2. Trusting no one.
When you think you can trust no one–maybe not even yourself–it’s hard to move forward. Trust is a fragile thing, easy to break, easy to lose, and hard to get back. Trust begets trust, so you have to at least trust yourself before you can trust others.
3. Worrying about what others think.
As long as you think and worry about what other people think, you will be possessed by their thoughts. The unhappiest people are those who care about what other people think. To succeed, do what you want and give them a reason to talk about your success.
4. Allowing problems to overwhelm you.
Thinking too much turns situations into problems. The problem is not the problem; the problem is thinking you have a problem and allowing it to overwhelm you and spur you into overthinking. Let it go and let it be.
5. Thinking you have control.
We like to think we can control what happens. You cannot control everything, of course, but you can control how you respond to things. The belief that we are in control is an illusion; our response to our thoughts is our power to make a difference.
6. Not believing in yourself.
Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will. Not believing in yourself twists things around, and often it makes things worse than they actually are. Belief in yourself takes just a little bit of confidence–work on cultivating it before doubt crushes you.
7. Letting negativity rule you.
When your thoughts dwell only on negativity, you don’t make room for positivity to take root. Train your mind to see the good in everything. Positivity is always a choice, and success depends on the quality of our thoughts.
8. Dwelling on the past.
If you spend your time thinking about the past and dwelling on what went wrong, you will be tempted to respond the same old way, being the same old victim–and you’re robbing yourself of creating your future. Success lies in understanding the past but not dwelling there.
9. Feeling conflicted about the struggle.
Remember, every struggle you go through makes you wiser and stronger. Don’t let your struggles break you; let them make you.
10. Not giving yourself a break.
If you think messing up is wrong and making mistakes is failure, think again and give yourself a break. Good things take time, and often there are lessons that must be learned before we can get where we are going.
11. Dwelling on what you want that you’re not getting.
If you are thinking about how you are not getting what you want, remember there are many people who will never have what you have right now.
12. Feeling lost and not found.
If you are thinking that you’ve lost your way, work to be grateful for what you have. Remember, life does not have to be perfect to be wonderful, and success does not always come to those who seek it. It’s sometimes in getting lost that we find what helps us the most.
Toxic thoughts must be dealt with before we can face success. Most of what we create will be with our heart, and most of what we build will be from our thoughts. Let’s keep close tables on what it is we’re building.
N A T I O N A L B E S T S E L L E R
THE LEADERSHIP GAP
What Gets Between You and Your Greatness
After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.
Additional Reading you might enjoy:
- 12 Successful Leadership Principles That Never Grow Old
- A Leadership Manifesto: A Guide To Greatness
- How to Succeed as A New Leader
- 12 of The Most Common Lies Leaders Tell Themselves
- 4 Proven Reasons Why Intuitive Leaders Make Great Leaders
- The One Quality Every Leader Needs To Succeed
- The Deception Trap of Leadership
Photo Credit: Getty Images
Of Lolly’s many awards and accolades, Lolly was designated a Top-50 Leadership and Management Expert by Inc. magazine. Huffington Post honored Lolly with the title of The Most Inspiring Woman in the World. Her writing has appeared in HBR, Inc.com, Fast Company (Ask The Expert), Huffington Post, and Psychology Today, and others. Her newest book, The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness has become a national bestseller.